Gaijin SMASH

I've given up trying to fit into Japan. At all times I'm aware of being watched, noticed and judged. And I realised after reading a book called the "Blue Eyed Salaryman" - a story about an Irish guy who made it into Mitsubishi and became a life employee - that even if I DID understand the culture and language completely, I'd never fit in anyway!! I think foreigners make up 3% of the population, so it kind of figures that the foreign are noticed - particularly the large girl with the mushroom cut stomping around in Doc Martens.

Now that I've had this realisation though, I'm making like the Hulk and Gaijin Smashing at every opportunity!

Basically, Gaijin Smashing is the wilful breaking of Japanese rules (perhaps unspoken or assumed) by one who is not Japanese. Gaijin - it means literally "outside person" = gai/outside, jin/person. The Japanese are Nihonjin.

So when I'm eating an apple (skin ON), crossing the road at a red light, pushing back on the train and blowing my nose in public, I'm enjoying it! It's like being given permission to be dumb. In fact, it's expected!

Recently, Gareth, Mirabel and I went to USJ. I don't think we Gaijin Smashed it (much) but we had good times in this dated land of madness. It was January, but they were still blaring Christmas Carols. One of the attractions was "Backdraft - the Movie". Interviews conducted with the stars and directors were overdubbed in Japanese. It was surreal and hilarious. Other rides we went on were Spiderman, Terminator 2, Peppermint Patties waterslide (the crappest thing I've ever done - a 30 minute wait to slide down in freezing water for 2 minutes), Jaws, Jurassic Park , Back to the Future and Hollywood Dream - an epic rollercoaster which had me screaming, holding my breath, blocking my ears and squeezing my eyes shut all at the same time.

I know this sounds ridiculous, but when I saw this Universal globe I almost cried...why? I think I was overwhelmed and surprised that I was there! When I was a kid, the thought of coming here was impossible. And suddenly, here I am in Japan, taking a train to "Universal City" and walking right in! I sound like I was born in Rwanda or something...

Perfectly manicured Hello Kitty's at the Hello Kitty Shop ^_^

This is when I knew things were gonna get good.

This is some sort of rapping, singing, break dancing Sesame Street "crew", bringing the message of fruit and vegetables to the tune of Can't Touch This.

I couldn't take my eyes off this Cookie Monster veritable midget. He was moving way too fast for my liking. Cookie Monster is FAT and FULL, he can't move with the speed of lightening!!

I resisted the urge to rush up to Big Bird - who kept looking at me - and doing something...not sure what exactly.

Laters homies.

Some stuff from JURASSIC PARK - the actual gate and cars!!!

And that's about it. I was a bit lazy with taking pics. But overall - it was an pricey experience that I enjoyed; but I don't need to go back there probably ever again.

Japan - Day Fifteen

Had the Halloween Party with Aim on Saturday night. It was ok - I didn't fully realise it was an opportunity to meet with potential students to tutor, I thought it was a shindig for students, teachers and staff. I ended up chatting to someone called Jun Sakata. I resisted the urge to tell her that Sakata is the brand of my fave rice crackers. Anyhow, to my surprise during our conversation she said she would like to learn English from me! The next time I see her, I'll tell her about the rice crackers.

OK so now I need to vent. Met a few westerners, current and new tutors from all over the world at the party. Man, foreigners in Japan are weird. If they're not ignoring you completely because you're not Japanese (I guess I can semi understand that) then they're talking to you like you're learning English yourself - because they've "lost their English". One couple - a Japanese girl and an American guy - when they found out I was from New Zealand they were like "oh, we are jealous! We were just talking about New Zealand. We are jealous!" I was like "why?". They used big smiles and hand gestures all the way through.

Moved on from them, met an ok American guy called Roger who said he worked in film before coming to Japan. I asked him what he did exactly in film (he didn't expect to be asked that) he said just whatever he could get; but he's working on some feature length screen plays. I laughed on the inside. But he was nice enough, he's into breakdancing, he's done it for a year.

There was another guy from Leeds - he seemed a dimwit. He was pretty annoying. I had a nametag on with a number behind it which was a raffle number. He asked me what number I was: "I'm 27". To which he said "how old are you?" "25" "You said you were 27!" Good one. Then we played Bingo. I said "I love Bingo!" He said "Who is he?"
I quickly moved away from him.

Then there was a group conversation. There was the typical loud mouth American hassling everybodys country of origin. Poms, Crims, Sheepshaggers etc. I think it's the done thing when you're overseas. People complain that Christchurchians always ask what school you go to. Well this is kinda the same thing.

This American guy, he asked me where I was from? I said I'm a New Zealander. He was like "a Kiwi". That annoyed me for some reason. He asked my name, and I said "Darlene". He said I was the first Darlene he'd met, apart from Darlene in Roseanne. I responded with my typical answer, "yeah, it's kind of an American white trash name". BUT THEN...he said "well actually, Roseanne's family wasn't white trash; they had a house." Wow. I stand corrected!!!

I met two Australian girls too. I got talking to one of them, then the other rushed over and made sure I knew that I was talking to "her" friend. It was nice doing the whole "wow, we're in Japan, how's your experience?" thing, because one thing that I've missed is sharing my experience (real time) with a friend. Talking to westerners is like missing cheese or foods you can't get here - you miss it more because it's not available directly. Eventually I realised they were drama theatrical types (not in a good Braydon way, in an "I'm the lead in Romeo and Juliet high school production because I'm the most popular girl in school" kind of way). We ended up exchanging numbers, then walked to the train station. As we said goodbye I said "I'll probably end up messaging you guys because I'm DESPERATE for friends!".

As I walked away I thought to myself - a) I'm not that desperate for friends, and b) that was a really inappropriate thing to say. I deleted their numbers from my phone.

It has started to rain, and get windy. The sky got scarily dark, quite early on today.

Glenn took me around Sannomiya and Port Rokko, or Port Kobe, not sure what it's called. It was rainy and grim, but still cool. That's a ferris wheel - there are several scattered around Kobe. I hope when Peter comes to Japan we can go on a ferry ride around the port.

This sign cracks me up everytime I use the toilets at Rokko station. It reminds me of something Jenna would draw. It's the eye and the arrow which does it for me.

Japan - Day Four

First things first:

http://www.mustlovejapan.com/howto/howto_restroom/

My purpose for today was to do a dummy run into a town? city? area? Not sure exactly, but a place called Namba which is just under an hour away. I have a job interview there tomorrow so needed to practice taking the train to Umeda/Osaka, transferring to the Midosuji line to get to Namba. The train stations are massive, kind of like our biggest malls, so the practice was necessary. I made it, and thought that Namba was cool so took some snaps!!

A view from my uncles place, today was such a clear and beautiful day that I saw the port for the first time!!

My train arriving to my local train station, this is the one taking me to Umeda where I transfer. About a 40 minute trip, seems to go fast when you're a gawking tourist.

View from the train, took this photo to show the green mountains that surround Kobe. Apparently locals would never live there, preferring to cluster near to the train stations for conveniences sake. Atop those mountains there are lodges etc that hold weddings. You can cable car up there.

This girl was dressed like Little Bo Peep, she got on the train that I transferred to. Couldn't get a good enough photo without feeling like a stalker.

I think this street is what I thought I'd see when I imagined Japan. This is in Namba.

A cool colourful building.

This building blew my mind, don't know why. Probably the sheer size and minimalism of it!

Everyone here rides bikes, from the elderly to the young, and they're all awesome bikes that you wish you had. This is just one of them, took it for the Marks and Kits out there.

Biking.

After I found my job interview place, went for a walk and found this park. It was a little bit grotty but it was really nice to sit in a big open space.

Couldn't resist this sunset shot, took it when I got back to Rokko.

OK. So I made some food purchases today which are noteworthy. Number 1 - Corn Flavoured Doritos, which really turned out to be Corn Soup Flavoured Doritos. Not that nice; think chicken and corn flavouring from 2 minute noodles on corn chips.

An Oreo Bar - just tasted like a Milo Bar.

POCARI SWEAT is a healthy beverage that smoothly supplies the lost water and electrolytes during perspiration. With the appropriate density and electrolytes, close to that of human body fluid, it can be easily absorbed into the body.

It tasted like sweat.